I told my daughters NEVER financially depend on a man and they dont thank God. If your husband does admit that he is gay, its important to remember that he didnt choose this life to hurt you. Does A Friends With Benefits Relationship Actually Work? Saying I cant stand you anymore, so go live somewhere else while I stay in this house you paid for and, no, Im not minimizing the important role of a housewife, but he DID technically pay the money for it is unfair, in my opinion. alone are not a sure-fire sign your husband is gay, but women who report that their husbands turned out to be gay often say this was something they noticed first. He watches or seems to be comfortable watching pornography with gay male scenes. I am guessing your husband is retiring with the notion of supporting 1 household and not 2 on the retirement income that is available. My husband retired and the only thing he enjoys is TV, and complaining about political stuff, and that is literally it! But often, when people experience a big life change and retirement is certainly among the biggest their temperaments change too. all of a sudden its a very important fact that *he* paid for the house. He makes eye contact with another man that seems to linger a little too long. Then youll get your time away from this monster and he can enjoy a little bit of relaxation and private time in your joint home. This is really interesting. . You can also pleasure by caressing, touching, and stroking one another, having oral sex, or incorporating sex toys into your sex play. 2. Between age 40 and 50, most men notice that their erections aren't what they used to be. Again, this could be caused by other things as well, but could be present if your husband is gay. Your husband needs to know this. (If you're thinking that you can cure the gay by having your husband go to gay conversion therapy, read this.). There are sometimes physical causes at play. on the computer he uses, even though he claims he has nothing to do with it. March 18, 2014, 6:22 pm. If the LW is unhappy and has brought this to his attention and he hasnt done anything about it, make plans accordingly. Hes selfish and self centered. Making this decision, at any age, can be frightening! If not, then he at least deserves the chance to hear how she feels and make changes if he can and she might have more chance of success if the discussion comes in the context of a marriage counselor. Why Can't I Get or Keep an Erection? - WebMD They had a system where shed hide his whiskey and only give it to him a few times a week, and he drank beer from noon until midnight. !And all i get is getting abused buy him and so moral support at all!I cook clean and do a lot for him i am giving up because dont need to need to be yelled at all!! He may even go so far as . I sympathize with the LW, but I also wonder if the husband knows anything about this. They no longer rise . so honestly who cares who moves out where, when? This is breaking my heart. A majority of the country thinks that at least 20 percent of Americans at least one in five of us are gay or lesbian. BUT! i know, i know, its not all about sex and shes not responsible for his happiness and blah blah blah, but im telling you women have control over the tone of the marriage and thats how men connect with their woman. Sometimes a woman may have been in a heterosexual relationship for years and yet feel something is somehow "off;" and she may find herself asking, "Is my husband gay?" Keeping that in mind, you may experience a sense of loss and heartache which youll need to process, but perhaps you could seek out some help and support or counseling to help you navigate this situation together, in love and kindness. Some gay men believe that being married can rid them of their homosexuality. Sounds like you just need an escape from each other to me. Everything in life works itself out. Enjoy life with your friends, grandchildren and whatever your interested in. List of Indian films of 2023 - Wikipedia At first sex was kinda OK, but after a few years he got bore on how we did sex. He thought it be nice to change our positions and make it more fun. how people advocate getting married as such a highly desirable thing in this country but have no idea what it entails. Life goes by so quickly do not waste time trying to figure your spouse out . Researchers believe that for many men erectile dysfunction is caused by a combination of physical, psychological, and cultural factors. Consider this foreplay. He is turned-off by normal sexual activity and accuses you of being oversexed, aggressive, or a nymphomaniac when you have normal sexual needs. Again, this could be caused by other things as well, but could be present if your husband is gay. Talk to your daughters seriously! Erectile difficulties can cause feelings of inadequacy in both men and their partners. It is entirely possible that he might deny that hes gay from the offset, without giving you any satisfactory answers to your questions. Wendy, Where did the thumbs go? (In most states and this is not legal advice). Cant find information on the site about your health concern or issue? It can be difficult and frustrating for men and their partners to cope with erectile dysfunction, especially when the cause is unclear. So, its really, really important to talk this through, and Id suggest doing so before the husband officially retires because he may not be prepared for the kind of financial hit that a divorce entails. Each may internalize the situation, fearing that s/he is the one to blame. Read less. I can see how that sucks in some cases, imagine if your spouse cheats on you and youre the breadwinner and they still get 50%. Me. Kicking him out of his own house wouldnt be the right move. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. iwannatalktosampson That doesn't cause ED directly, but it can set . Good luck. Signs Your Husband or Man May Be Gay. Is My Husband Gay? If you dont find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. This site complies with the HONcode standard for Do you want a divorce or separation? I will soon be financially able . He has been to many doctors, including a urologist, neurologist, orthopedist, you name it. Whats got me bothered is that shee been married for 40 years and just NOW she decided she cant stand him. Something I had ignored for a long time. He increasingly got more cranky and thinner, and none of us could explain why, and anytime we suggested a doctor, hed get pissed. I can appreciate that, after spending your entire adult life living with the same person, the thought of living alone is scary. You could make an argument that she could get spousal support if they split, but how many courts are willing to grant support to a woman who leaves of her own accord? You couldnt pay me enough money in the world to be miserable. Self-harm includes the stereotypical, Particularly when young, some people may ask, "How do I know if I am gay?" Obviously, you cannot change your husband, which I'm sure you know after more than 40 years together. Unless there is violates, hitting and no sex anymore. Ive tried talking to him, but he just gets angry and defensive. Youll be ok. in their lives too. We dont for sure. Maybe I should say we both messed up our marriage but he is extreme. American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), Partner can't maintain erection for intercourse, While engaging in other behaviors besides intercourse?. What will you do to take care of you now? You find pop-ups of gay pornography on the computer while he claims they are not his. Rape stories, Every woman on earth has fantasized about some explicit sexual fantasy that she may or may not have been too ashamed to talk about. as a woman how would you feel if your husband said, i dont want to have a meaningful conversation with you anymore, i just want to keep it light and talk about the weather like i do with every one else. Staying married because they may not understand is basically inertia like staying in your bad marriage, because it might rain tomorrow and your suitcases will get wet as you move out. she was allowed to study chemistry because she was a woman studying how to clean better. He probably hasnt had sex , or much of it in years. might help you work through this so that you can find the right way forward for you. In 2019, it was 23.6 percent almost a quarter. How would you like it when I cant drink at all because Epeilpsy and my husband works then comes home and keeps drinking a 12 pack at night What about your partner? I cant imagine this is a real letter, its shocking. What Im wondering is, has he always been like this? Signs of a Gay Husband, Parents of Gay Children and the Issues They Face, Gay Teen Issues Online Conference Transcript, Video on the Psychological Effects of Sex Reassignment, Facing Gay Discrimination, Stigma Day After Day, Depression Quotes & Sayings That Capture Life with Depression, Rape Victim Stories: Real Stories of Being Raped. Hes a mental abuser Ted Bundy level. Its far more difficult for someone who doesnt have experience inlets call it domestic artsto suddenly find himself or herself living alone. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. Middle-Age Erection Changes: What Couples Need to Know When you are locked in place by mights, which you arent even willing to explore, you are grasping for excuses to do nothing. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Keep Your Own Head On. As a Gay Man, I'll Never Be Normal - The New York Times is not an emergency or instant response service. Had we known he already had a diagnosis, we wouldnt have pushed so hard for the medical advice, and might have tried convincing him to cut back on his cigarettes and beer and put more effort into therapies that might have helped him. I was just being realistic that its likely she will have a tough financial future if she strikes out on her own. He tries to convince you that all relationships have a decline in sex even when you've only been together for a few years. Peyronie's disease, or penile scarring that results in a curved penis. The husband could be seen as the injured party in this scenario. and then women like ellen richards, the MIT graduate, were able to make careers for themselves where none existed before teaching domestic science, which would eventually turn into home ec, and then also researching domestic science. I just dont get where youre coming up with the opinion that its *likely* that she will have a tough financial future. I want to look her up now. multiple sclerosis (MS) liver or kidney disease. I can't get my husband hard : r/hivaids - Reddit There are no thumbs, but I want to like this comment. Having sexual attraction to the same sex is no one's fault and likely has been there since birth.
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